Today's topic is defending your words. Anyone who knows me can tell you I love a good debate. I like to think I'm semi-intelligent and what I don't know I can bullshit. Once I get my teeth into an issue I refuse to let go; therefore, a debate with me could last for years. Now, this does not mean I refuse to concede a point to my opponent, but I'll do so while pointing out another aspect that proves me right.This debating I do is best done in person but that's not always the circumstance. These days I'm finding myself debating online as I'm taking online courses. Yes, we have internet on this ship! And a very good advancing education program. This week I found myself under attack where I wasn't even trying to provoke anyone. I wrote my opinion and was soundly fired upon. So, I did what every writing pirate worth her salt would do, I told him in a pretty way to shove it up his as….well, I might have been more tactful than that. But he was smart enough NOT to try for a snappy comeback.
So, it made me think, we all have to deal with turning our work, our words, over to another for their opinion, reaction or even (God forbid) approval. How far will you go to defend your words? I have been told my story will never sell, to change a character's occupation, to change another character's name and even had entirely new plots thrown my way. I admit to making minor changes in response to all of this but most of it I ignored. I'm stubborn, I could never deny that, but I also have to believe in my story. This is MY story. If it never sells so be it, but by golly the finished product will be mine and I'll stand beside it and fight them all.
How far will you go to defend your words? Will you draw your sword and fight to the death or turn tale and run? Have you faced any of these battles as I have? And how badly do you want to know what I said to that little land lubbing, snot-nosed pain in the ass?
30 comments:
I think it's far easier to defend anything face-to-face. I find it stunning---and kind of horrifying---how some people cannot extrapolate from the written word what the intent was. But then there are some people who find the anonymity of online confrontation an excuse for being asshats. Stick to your guns and write for yourself. Worry about the critics when they count---when they're agents or editors.
Morning, Maggie. I'm not looking forward to when those people get their hands on my stuff. But I think I'd be more open to the suggestions at that point. I think...LOL!
I want to know BADLY. I love learning new ways to tell people to shove it up their as...
As for me, how far as I willing to defend? Did you see the fight scene in POTC? Where they were being out-sailed, out-gunned--and they had nothing to fire but silverware? That's me. I might be throwing flatware, but I'll go down with pride and absolute knowing I'm doing the best for my characters.
I have to say that I'm pretty open-minded when it comes to others' opinions of my work. However, it's the extent to which I take their advice that varies.
I think I've found that I have to look at the motivation behind their specific changes. Then I evaluate whether I think they're valid or work with my overall idea. And who the critic is.
It's tough because I love to write for myself, but I'm also writing to be read. It's a real balance, between being true to myself and trying to make sure the ideas in my story are universally meaningful. At least to a larger universe than the scary insides of my head.
This is one of things that discourages me most about writing. I like MY story, and will I be satisified if in the end it doesn't even resemble my original concept? I am a stick to your guns kind of gal, I would be hard pressed to conform just to write what sells.
Hellion - remind me to take away all spoons if we ever have a disagreement - in person. LOL! I'm wary to go into detail as the confrontation was over a bit of politics. No politics on this ship unless it's about rum rations.
Marnee - WHO the advice comes from is crucial. If the person reads exactly the kind of books that I want to write and as a reader says I don't get this part right here, I'll take a good long look. But if the person next to me who has never read a romance says something, I'm more apt to ignore it.
Lissa - I'm not saying my story hasn't changed and evolved as I've learned and I'm sure it will evolve even further but there are just some things that are what they are - unchangable! LOL!
And I have to say, I'm feeling quite confident about our crew should we ever come under attack. *g*
Look at Marnee--I swear if Avon was reading right now, they'd sweep her up for the darling writer she is. *grins*
As for the rest of us--I think we're all trying to do something universally meaningful too. I understand the pull of having ACTION bold and brilliant, a heroine savvy and with a really cool job--after all this is escapism, but is it wrong to write the story for the heroine who doesn't have the really cool job? Why does everyone have to be a CEO and live in NY? I don't understand. *I* don't find their stories meaningful; I don't care about their HEA. I want someone like me--but a bit braver--who ends up with someone cute and charming. Why is it wrong to write that story because it's not action packed every second?
I wonder if I wrote a romance about a porn star who got out of the business because he was looking for his true love... if it would sell? If it was something I believed in, whether or not it would sell, I'd fight to the death for my porn star just needing a little traditional love from an amish girl. *grin*
Morning, y'all.
Sometimes when the writing isn't fun for me to write, it's because I'm writing for what I think others will want to read. And I hate that. I like to write what I want to write and I don't want to be told otherwise, unless that otherwise is going to edit my finished word or publish said word. Sometimes I find that this business is harder than trying to solve the rubix cube.. and for me, that's impossible.
Here's the question, Sin. In writing what you want to write are you writing what you would want to read? Because that's where I think we go right. I've been reading romance for *cough* a long time and I'm writing a story I would want to read. Since the books I've read have been read and liked by many other people, I think it makes sense that I can't be that far off the mark.
Now, elaborate on said porn star. LOL! And that Amish comment is so vague....who could you be talking about? Hmmmmmm.....*tapping chin*
When I write for myself, I write what I'd want to read. I think that's an important step in the writing process. But always what I want to read and what everyone else wants to read are two different things. I don't think much of my story is romance. I'm not much of a romantic myself. I'm more of a realist and my heroines tend to lean that way as well. Do I believe in love at first sight? Yes. Do I believe that love will always last forever. No.
Not to get us on a whole other topic. LOL
Now for the porn star and his amish love. Maybe I shall save it for my Wednesday blog.. that could be fun. LOL
*nearly spewing pieces of banana at her computer screen* Sin!
I would so totally buy that book! Do you think he could truly love poor, unaccomplished Amish girl? I am rooting for their happy ending.
*innocent look*
*blinking*
What? *I* didn't do anything.
And with the mention of bananas - the whole boat breaks into song...
Day-o, day-o
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Day, me say day, me say day, me say day
Me say day, me say day-o
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Work all night on a drink of rum
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Stack banana till de mornin' come
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Come, Mister tally man, tally me banana
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Come, Mister tally man, tally me banana
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Lift six foot, seven foot, eight foot bunch
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Six foot, seven foot, eight foot bunch
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Day, me say day-o
Daylight come and me wan' go home
Day, me say day, me say day, me say day...
Daylight come and me wan' go home
I LOVE that song, Terri! It's gonna be in my head all day long now!
I've been a bit of a weenie when it comes to defending anything I do. I say I'm a passivist. Others have said I'm just chickens#$t! It's all in the perspective! I don't like confrontation, but being a mother has definitely turned me into quite the fighter. If it has to do with my kids I pretend I'm someone else - someone with a backbone. LOL And believe it or not the old saying "fake it til you make it" is proving true. I'm a bit more opinionated and obstinate now than I ever have been before.
When it comes to the writing, it's pretty much what everyone else has been saying, though. If it changes too much from what I envisioned, then it isn't MY story anymore and I wouldn't really want my name on it.
Stick with us, Irish. We'll have you shooting first and asking questions later.
And I'm always one for confrontation but if you do ANYTHING against or to my child, you can kiss your ass goodbye.
Sin you totally need to write the porn dude with the amish chick...that is so believable and maybe he can convert her to porn star and they can do a smut scene with her wearing just her little hat...
I'm going to hell..but that would make an awesome satire:)
Hellion - Avon, I hope you're reading, I'm looking for a publisher. LOL!!
But, I don't think that a story has to be about a really cool person. I prefer stories that aren't about perfect people. Perfect people are boring. :) I think as long as h/h grow somehow, it can be able any h/h. I love any story with full characters.
Ter - I agree, who the critic is makes a HUGE difference. If Mr. Joe Shmoe who's never read a romance novel tells me that something is wrong, I doubt I'd give him the weight that I'd give you guys or someone else who's an avid reader/talented writer.
Irish - I think I've gotten more opinionated as I've gotten older. I think too often women tend towards that and then we get sick of it and start speaking up. Go you!
Ter - I think you're right, about writing what we think we'd like to read. Otherwise, I think it'd feel false to everyone else too.
Lissa/Sin - I agree about the smut scene and the hat!! I would TOTALLY read that!
And her name has to be Delilah! Can you just imagine a smut scene with all those "thous" and "thees"? LOL!
Delilah! LOL!! Perfect. The inexperienced farm girl turns hussy. An instant classic.
I'm also totally for writing everyday people. I love SEP and Jennifer Crusie and I think they do a pretty good job at portraying everyday people. Nora has done a decent job of that in the past, too. Lately, she's just been getting lazy with her characterizations and endings, IMHO. I don't need to read about prince and princess' and over the top millionaires all the time. It's nice to read about Bob and Jane who could be your neighbors (Hellion's Sean and Julia, anyone!). Those are the type of stories I think I could write.
And, Sin, I love the porn star/Amish girl romance. There is a line in Lisa Kleypas' Dreaming of You where Sara says to Derek Craven "I don't know anything and you know too much!" Very seductive scene! You can make it work!
Great point, Irish. I listened to a Jennifer Crusie audio book this weekend about a HS art teacher and a mechanic. And it was HAWT! LOL! I did learn it's not good to listen to a great sex scene against a wall while driving 75 mph through the Smokey Mountains. It's a wonder I'm not a permanent part of one of those Jersey Walls. LOL!
God, I better give Sean & Julia a HEA or I'm never going to hear the end of it. Irish will show up to my booksignings (you will, right?) and despite that this is a perfectly valid tale of common folk in love, Irish is going to say, "I can't wait to read it, I'm sure it's great, but how are Sean & Julia doing?"
She is quite fixated. Though I can't say that I blame her. I'd read that book in a heartbeat. You'll just have to give in and write the damn thing. LOL!
My sister listens to books on tape all the time, Ter. She has to drive a lot for work. She says she's had to turn it off several times when she realizes she's gripping the steering wheel a bit too hard! With her it's mostly wall banging moments though when she wants to yell at a character for being TSTL.
I have a real hard time listening to books on tape. Especially when they're reading the sex scenes (could be the whole Catholic thing happening again!). The only one I really enjoyed was Nora's Jewels of the Sun. The Irish accents really made the story come alive for me.
What can I say, Hellion, you got me hooked! I have a soft spot for Irish bartenders! That is definitely a case of me being able to identify with the characters. Neighborhood bar, high school sweethearts, etc. etc. I probably went to school with Julia and lived across the street from Sean! LOL
You know, Irish, I'd say maybe YOU should write that story. LOL!
I wish I read this book instead of listened to it only because I didn't like the way the person read did it but it was a very good story and Nick is one hot mechanic. Hubba Hubba.
Luckily I'm a Catholic girl raised with HBO in the house. Not much offends or makes me blush.
Terrio I was in the Smokey mountains this weekend! We might have driven right past one another:)
Wouldn't that just beat all? I drove through to Knoxville Saturday then drove back out and through NC Sunday. I was the little white truck weaving on Saturday. LOL!
I have a great need for harmony in my life, so I avoid confrontations unless I totally lose my temper. I evade rather than confront. :)
The critics I have the hardest time defending my words against are the well-intentioned,friendly ones who are knowledgeable about romance and genuinely want me to produce the best work I can but think I should write more like they write. Right now I am seriously considering making TLWH an inspirational romance because there seems to be little market for stories that fall between strictly sweet and smoking hot. I think I can write the former better than the latter, although neither is what I want to write.
Oh, Janga, write the story you feel most strongly about. You have such beautiful prose any genre would be lucky to have you. If I've learned nothing else it's that there is a home for just about every kind of story these days.
We all seem to focus on one general goal but in looking more into this industry I'm excited to know there are many more options than I ever realized. And you are so far ahead of most new authors in that your story is so lyrical. No matter what you choose to write, I hope you'll keep me in mind when it's time to pass out those signed copies. *g*
Thanks for taking the time to stop by.
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