This ship is full of a bunch of whiners.
First “I got busy and didn’t have time” and then “I’m busy procrastinating” and yesterday’s, “It wasn’t flowing and I’ve only now got my groove back.”
I swear to God, I’m going to start flailing the tails, my little buccaneers, and then you’ll know what real pain is! Do you think pirates only steal when they feel like it? No. They’re pirates. They steal ALL THE TIME, even if they’re on their last leg…and arm. Whatever. Getting booty doesn’t just happen when you feel like it. When you’re inspired. When you’re in the mood. Being a pirate is a job…and as Pirate Red said, “Work is work. It’s not fun. If work were fun, it’d be called happy fun time.”
Pirate Red is perhaps less familiar than the Dread Pirate Roberts, who said, “Life is pain, princess. Anyone who says differently is selling something.”
So anyone who tells you writing isn’t hard—is selling their book of “Secrets to Writing: How to Write Your Novel Painlessly” for the reasonable price of $29.99—and should be tied to the cannon and flogged. Writing is hard. You might have some second-wind moments where you really are enjoying your pirating—and I admit, there are those days. And yes, it IS useless to pursue booty on a ship without plunder—but if you’re abandoning all ships because of that excuse, you might have to reconsider the notion you’re a lazy pirate. And life is pain. And work is work. Inspiration is for sissy pirates.
If you're going to be a writer, the first essential is just to write. Do not wait for an idea. Start writing something and the ideas will come. You have to turn the faucet on before the water starts to flow.
~Louis L'Amour
What shall we do with a shirking writer?
What shall we do with a shirking writer?
What shall we do with a shirking writer
Whining at the keyboard?
Throw her into bed with a man named Ranger
Throw her into bed with a man named Ranger
Throw her into bed with a man named Ranger—
That’ll help her story!
What shall we do with a shirking writer?
What shall we do with a shirking writer?
What shall we do with a shirking writer
Whining at the keyboard?
Tie her up, Ranger, until she’s inspired
Tie her up, Ranger, until she’s inspired
Tie her up, Ranger, until she’s inspired
And show her what a tongue is for!
What shall we do with a shirking writer?
What shall we do with a shirking writer?
What shall we do with a shirking writer
Whining at the keyboard?
Flog her and tease her until she cries mercy!
Flog her and tease her until she cries mercy!
Flog her and tease her until she cries mercy!
And begs to go back writing…
Anyone else got any lyrics they want to add?
